Dark Matches: Crash Musclegate defeated Wesles Wagner, Rough Hog Reid Harrison defeated Billy Taylor
The HAW Theme played to kick the show off.
Edward Findleton: Welcome to HAW! We’re here tonight in Tampa Bay, Florida! We have a huge main event tonight, Oden Schreiner and Lovable Liam will team up against Mitchell Row and Scarred Badger!
THE Casey Gains: That’s not all the action, Peter “Carnage” Horn will battle Night Prince, Douglas Brunswick is in a handicap match against El Espectro and The United States, but we’re kicking things off with Glenny Pax and Cyberhemoth vs The Samurais of Power!
The arena lights went out until Glenny’s music played, entering with Cyberhemoth. Shortly after, the Samurais of Power came out, with Trickshot and Ozzie Reagan teaming up and Sensei Onaga at ringside.
Edward Findleton: The Samurais of Power getting a hometown Florida cheer tonight, but they’re going to have their hands full!
In a match going 6:42, Glenny Pax ended up pinning Ozzie Reagan with the Standing Tornado DDT. Sensei Onaga wisely got Ozzie and Trickshot out of the ring after the match when it looked like Glenny Pax and Cyberhemoth were about to beat down on Ozzie. As Glenny yelled at the Samurais of Power, the crowd erupted in cheers as King Donovan and Bigg Pimpin’ Alex walked out on stage, microphone in hand. The crowd’s noise caused Glenny to turn his attention to Donovan.
King Donovan: Yeah, you did pretty good. But it won’t be good enough. I know it won’t be. But if you’re so confident, let’s move your plan up for domination by one week. You and me, for the HAW National Championship, next week!
Glenny pondered it, and looked over at a Cyberhemoth. After a few moments, he nodded. Donovan smiled, and with that, went to the back with Alex.
Edward Findleton: The National Championship will be on the line next week! Dare I sare…it’s our main event?!
THE Casey Gains: It definitely sounds like it is!
Edward Findleton: Well folks, it looks like we have some more breaking news as we go backstage to Gregory Greystone.
Gregory Greystone: Hello ladies and gentlemen! I have just been told that earlier today, Sekino the Stunt Pilot was working out at a local gym. When leaving the gym, she was attacked in the parking lot! Investigators have tried to look at the security footage but it’s somehow too distorted to make out her attacker. If there’s any tips, please send us an email so we can turn it over to the proper authorities.
At that point, Jonah Webb walked up next to Gregory.
Jonah Webb: It’s a shame. I really hope she recovers fast. I would hate for her to miss any extended period of time. She’s got a future ahead of her….a very….interesting future.
Jonah Webb patted Gregory on the back, and walked off.
Gregory Greystone: Ladies and gentlemen, after that conversation, I will be the first to send an email! Back to you Edward and Casey!
Edward Findleton: Thank you Gregory! We got some good action coming up next with-
Edward was cut off as Franco Mancini’s music hit. He walked down to the ring in his ring gear, and took a mic.
Franco Mancini: I’m not wasting another year of my career. It’s not happening. I’m in a match against Asher Sutton last week? I’m a four time HAW World Champion and that’s what I get?! Enough of the BS matches. I am the Godfather of Professional Wrestling, and I want a challenge. Give me someone who has something to prove.
Franco threw the mic down and waited a bit until Sentinel’s music hit, walking out ready to wrestle.
Edward Findleton: A bit of an impromptu match here, but Sentinel fits the description for Franco!
THE Casey Gains: Sentinel had a bit of a down year in 2022 so if the veteran is looking to make a statement he still has it, then a win against Franco would go a long way.
The match saw Sentinel put up a valiant effort, but the sheer ruthlessness of Franco Mancini couldn’t be overcome, as Franco won in 3:26 with a Pickpocket. Franco once again left the ring after the match, no celebration, just a serious look that his job for the night was finished.
Edward Findleton: Well another strong victory by Franco Mancini tonight! I’m impressed!
THE Casey Gains: I’m starting to wonder if it’s actually Franco showing he has something to prove.
Edward Findleton: It very well may be. Regardless, we originally had another match scheduled next and…it’s actually now scheduled next, for real!
Douglas Brunswick’s music hit, and he came out first. Moments later it was Mayor Briggs’ music playing, as he walked out with El Espectro and The United States
Edward Findleton: Well these guys used to be Brunswick Bros…are they Briggs Bros now?
THE Casey Gains: Briggs Bros, mercenaries, call them what you want, but don’t call them the winners just yet. Last year, Brunswick pulled off one of the performances of his life, defeating three of the four Musclegang members on his own. A two on one handicap match isn’t a death sentence for him.
The match began, and Douglas Brunswick was able to hold his own well. The United States and El Espectro were able to make tags, keeping Brunswick always on his toes. After a near fall by The United States, he and El Espectro began to argue with referee Tom Hunter. With this going on, Briggs grabbed Brunswick and took him outside the ring, hitting a quick Half and Half Suplex. Briggs threw Brunswick back in, where The United States first hit The Double Knee Arm Breaker, tagged in El Espectro, who hit his own Inverted Stomp Facebreaker. El Espectro pinned Douglas Brunswick, and Briggs ran into the ring to celebrate.
Edward Findleton: Well this time the numbers were too much! El Espectro and The United States defeat Douglas Brunswick!
Briggs laughed and gloated in the face of the unconscious Brunswick, as the three wrestlers then departed to the back.
Elsewhere backstage, The O’Toole Brothers were talking, when The Navigators approached them.
Aiden North: Good evening!
Fergus O’Toole: What’s your business here?
Aiden North: Can’t we just talk to our future opponents like respectable men? Not everything needs to be a fight. All of us here are wrestlers…
Pete Arrow: Professional…wrestlers.
Aiden North: So can’t we just be professional at work?
Sean O’Toole: We’re all for being professional, sure. But there’s a difference between saying you’re a professional, and being professional. For example, being professional would involve treating the HAW Tag Team Titles with some more dignity.
Pete Arrow: More dignity? They’ve never been more talked about, more prestigious, and more coveted than ever before. We did more for the HAW Tag Team division in one month than you guys did in ten years.
Aiden North: But the best part is? None of that matters! At Downtown Disaster, it’s a fair two on two fight, as the most celebrated tag team in the world defends against some plucky underdogs! The crowd will love it!
Fergus O’Toole: Hah! So we’re the underdogs, are we?
Aiden North: Well, maybe not you Fergus. You’re pretty good.
Pete Arrow: But Sean? Oof. Did you see him miss his Superkick last week and nearly cost you the match?
Sean O’Toole: We recovered and won, that’s all that matters.
Aiden North: You won, yeah. But speaking of winning, Fergus has one more Tag Title reign than you because you were injury prone- I mean, out injured.
Pete Arrow: But hey, you two have some time to come up with a strategy for your weak link. Good luck!
The O’Tooles watched as The Navigators walked off.
Fergus O’Toole: Sean, don’t listen to ‘em. We’ve got this.
Fergus gave Sean a reassuring pat on the back, but Sean looked a bit lost in thought.
Back at ringside, Peter “Carnage” Horn’s music hit, as he came down to the ring Alfred Karneus. Night Prince then made his entrance, accompanied by Ninja.
Edward Findleton: Last month, Ninja became Chapter 12 in the Book of Carnage. Can Night Prince avoid a similar fate?
The match began with Horn dominating Night Prince, throwing him around like a ragdoll. Shortly into the match, Pastor James came running down to the ring. James approached Alfred Karneus, with James holding a bible and pointing at the Book of Carnage. Horn looked out at the commotion, and Night Prince went for a roll up but Horn kicked out.
THE Casey Gains: Night Prince almost stole win!
Pastor James then grabbed at the Book of Carnage, getting in a minor tussle with Karneus. Horn had seen enough and exited the ring, going straight for Pastor James. James ran around the ring, and Horn chased him, following him up the ramp.
Edward Findleton: Wait a minute! Referee Brenda Moses is at 7 count!
Karneus was now shouting at Horn to come back, and Horn finally heard him. He ran back to the ring, a half second before Brenda got to a 10 count. Night Prince went to attack him, but Horn quickly countered and hit the Side Sitout Powerslam. Horn covered for three and immediately went running into the back after James again.
Edward Findleton: Peter “Carnage” Horn keeps the undefeated streak alive and gets Chapter 13 in the Book of Carnage, but surprisingly, this was one of his closest calls!
THE Casey Gains: I’m telling you, if Pastor James caused this streak to end on a count out, I think James would be talking to God really soon.
Edward Findleton: I can’t argue that! Well folks, it’s almost time for our main event, but before we get there, we’re going to hear from Summer Fun, who are joining us live via..I guess with this quality, personal cell phone?
Daisy Fields: Hi Edward! Hi Casey!
On the jumbotron was Daisy Fields and Maple Blossom, sitting on a living room couch with psychedelic artwork hanging from the walls.
Edward Findleton: Good evening! We’re happy you two joined us tonight, and it’s really courageous to come and talk while you’re going through a deeply personal issue!
Daisy and Maple looked at each other with their eyes open in surprise, then started to whisper to each other.
Daisy Fields: Do you remember what you said?
Maple Blossom: Not at all. Let me handle it.
Maple nodded and cleared her throat.
Maple Blossom: This deeply personal issue is really difficult, but we’re strong and we have good spirits. We are….doing great. As well as any person can do in such a tough and troubled time.
Edward Findleton: Truly inspirational! Now last week, you had quite the run in with HAW Women’s Tag Team Champions, the Exotic Delights. How are you feeling after that encounter?
Maple Blossom: ….That is a very good question Edward. We are strong, and we are doing great.
Edward Finldeton: Uhh, ok?
Daisy Fields: Haha! I just put this filter on that makes Casey look like a girl!
Maple Blossom: The filter affects you, not the person on the other end.
Daisy Field: Oh shoot I’m sorry!
THE Casey Gains: I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that and read my notes. They say “Do interview with Summer Fun where they challenge Exotic Delights.” Are you two going to do that?
Daisy Fields: Oh yeah! They kicked us out of the party! Not cool.
Maple Blossom: Yeah! So we’re going to challenge them for the titles!
At that point, the Exotic Delights music hit, and they walked out onto the stage with the Biofuel Engineers, looking up at Summer Fun on the jumbotron.
Lela Lacruse: So you two want to challenge us for the HAW Women’s Tag Team Championships?
Maple Blossom: Oh dude they’re so tiny compared to us. Look!
Daisy Fields: Whoa…but maybe we’re actually giants?
Phueng Ahunai: Hey! Listen to us!
Maple Blossom: This is too much to think about, I need a break. Bye!
Phueng Ahunai: Wait! We accept!
The screen cut off and went to black, leaving The Exotic Delights frustrated.
Lela Lacruse: So as Phueng said, we accept. And if they can actually make it to Downtown Disaster, all of you can watch us beat them! Let’s get out of here.
The champions left the stage and went to the back.
Edward Findleton: There we have it! A tag team match for the titles has been put in place! But speaking of tag teams…we have a tag team main event next!
THE Casey Gains: And I do NOT look like a girl!
The MuscleGang came down to the ring first, as Oden and Liam were accompanied by Crash and Frederic. Mitchell Row and Scarred Badger followed next, taking care of Kitty in her wheelchair and placing her at ringside.
The match began with Liam and Badger going at, but frequent tags between all competitors were made throughout. The MuscleGang eventually got the upper hand, and Oden Schreiner delivered a Chokeslam to Mitchell Row and picked up the victory in 14:26.
Edward Findleton: And the champion is pinned! Could this be what we see in two weeks?!
THE Casey Gains: If Oden wants his career to continue, then he’ll need to hit that Chokeslam again at Downtown Disaster.
Edward Findleton: Well we’re just about out of time, but join us next week where King Donovan will take on Glenny Pax for the HAW National Championship! Good night!
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