HAW Throwdown’s theme started the show, with the camera panning to some wrestlers sitting ringside in the front row.
Edward Findleton: Welcome to HAW! Tonight we’re in San Francisco, and you can see sitting near ringside is Phoenix, Fun Fight Machine, Cole Arcane, and the HAW World Champion, Douglas Brunswick!
THE Casey Gains: Georgios and Kitty, rightfully so, have refused to come to the arena tonight once they heard no one knew the whereabouts of the psychotic, insane Mitchell Row.
At that moment, Little Man’s music started up, and he came down to the ring and grabbed a microphone.
Little Man: Hey! You guys in the front row! You all suck! Because I’m going to be the winner of Destroy All Wrestlers! All I need is my ticket in!
Edward Findleton: I don’t even think he’s appeared on TV this year…
Little Man continued taunting the wrestlers, until Freezerman came on the jumbotron.
Freezerman: I’ll start off by saying Little Man, you are not going to be a contestant at Destroy All Wrestlers. But, don’t get angry just yet! You have a match right now with the very next entrant. Maybe good things can come your way if you pick up a victory tonight. Good luck!
Everyone’s attention turned to the ramp, and were met by the entrance of Pastor James, accompanied with Dixie Boyle and Ivy Clarke.
Edward Findleton: Pastor James! The last time we saw him was a bloody match against Cole Arcane!
THE Casey Gains: And the two are staring each other down as he makes his way down to the ring. I don’t think either man has forgotten about the pain they inflicted on each other.
Referee Dillon Bartos rang the bell, and James immediately hit a huge haymaker to Little Man. Little Man stumbled and James grabbed him from behind and hit the Cobra Clutch Slam, ending the match in seconds. James bent down to grab the microphone Little Man was previously using.
Pastor James: Brothers, sisters…one of the biggest challenges we always face is temptation. A temptation to fall to our vices, to sin. Believe me, I experience it too. In fact, I’m experiencing it right now. I’ve never felt a stronger temptation in my life, than to come out of this ring and knock Cole Arcane out!
At that, Arcane stood up, and was getting ready to jump the barrier, but Phoenix and Brunswick held him back. Meanwhile, James left the ring, and got right up in Arcane’s business.
Pastor James: Fortunately, I’m a kind, generous, forgiving member of the Lord’s flock. So I will wait until I see him in the ring at Destroy All Wrestlers and send this devil back to where he belongs!
Arcane had enough and jumped up onto the barricade. However, James then pushed Arcane, who fell backwards in Brunswick, Phoenix, and Fun, taking them all out. James didn’t care, and went to the back with Dixie and Ivy.
Edward Findleton: Well Pastor James making a big statement, and speaking of big statements, a special shoutout to the Sanchez family, who graciously allowed us to use their seats for this match! Unfortunately, I’m being told the chairs are now broken, so they’ll have to stand for the rest of the show.
THE Casey Gains: Nobody can find 4 extra chairs in this arena?
Edward Findleton: Onto the next segment!
Before Casey could say anymore, the MuscleGang came out and down to the ring.
Crash MuscleGate: Thank you! Thank you! Last week, evil was defeated! The MuscleGang destroyed The Shadow Hand once and for all! HAW is free from their scourge forever!
Lovable Liam: And for legal clarity, all members of The Shadow Hand are still contractually employed with HAW, but don’t let that ruin a good moment!
Frederic St. Pierre: The fact is, we are just better wrestlers than them. We have proven it time and time again. Together, The MuscleGang is stronger!
Crash MuscleGate: Badger, do you want some mic time?
Scarred Badger: No.
Crash MuscleGate: And there you have it. The MuscleGang has spoken! We’re out!
As they started to leave, Jonah Webb appeared on the jumbotron, in a dark, unknown area.
Jonah Webb: My apologies Crash. I wish I could be there in person but…well that doesn’t matter right now. What matters is, I don’t think The Shadow Hand is done with the MuscleGang. I think at End of the Trail…we all fight. May the truly best group win.
Crash MuscleGate: Ooh, look at Mr. Creepy Webb man, trying to remain relevant and cool! Trying to piggy back off our success! Listen, Frederic is right, we’ve beat you in every possible way. I personally don’t see why we need to do it again.
Jonah Webb: Crash…you annoy me so much. Your little “gang” has caused us such unforeseen hardship. Nothing terrible, but just…like a buzzing mosquito you can’t seem to kill. And that’s all I want to do, is finally, in a figurative sense, kill you guys.
Lovable Liam: Crash, we can possibly edit the audio to take out the figurative and get them actually fired and no longer contracted?
Jonah Webb: You know what Liam, go ahead and do that. It’s a shame we won’t cross paths again. I can use a good night’s sleep afterall, we’re currently very far ahead of you in time zones and we’ve been up all night….in Germany.
Jonah stepped out of the way, and Horn, Black, and May were holding a bloody and unconscious Oden Schreiner, in what looked to be a destroyed dining room. Webb walked behind them and laughed.
Jonah Webb: We’ll be at Throwdown next week if you reconsider!
The feed cut out, and a shocked MuscleGang all quickly rushed to the back, clearly no longer in their fun, upbeat mood.
Edward Findleton: Well that’s certainly a shocking twist from The Shadow Hand. They looked to have absolutely knocked the retired Oden Schreiner out. Well here in San Francisco, the show must go on, as we got a tag team match next!
The first team coming out were The Samurais of Power, with Trickshot and Ozzie Reagan being the main team, and Onaga sporting a knee brace from his Summit of Success match. Their opponents were Team Sentinel, Billy Taylor and Wesley Wagner, accompanied by Sentinel.
It was a very sportsman like match, going back and forth. Onaga and Sentinel shouted encouragement and gave advice, but remained out of the actual match. In the end Ozzie hit a Butterfly Backbreaker on Taylor, and got the pin.
After the match, both teams were shaking hands, until The Biofuel Engineers and Convict came down to the ring with microphones in one hand and kendo sticks in the other.
Dalton Elkins: What a stupid match from two stupid teams! Absolutely pointless in the grand scheme of things.
Sydney Mason: We beat The O’Toole Brothers last week. HAW should be focusing on us, the best tag team in the company! And we’d prove it if we were able to actually fight the tag team champs, instead of them getting the luxury of hiding in a singles match!
Dalton Elkins: So we figured…let’s just make sure everyone knows who the best team is…no matter what!
With that the Biofuel Engineers and The Convict started attacking the other teams with their kendo sticks, quickly striking them down. The beat downs were continuing, until The O’Toole Brothers came out. Sean and Fergus had no weapons, but now the numbers were starting to wear on Dalton, Sydney, and The Convict. As Dalton and Sydney rushed from the ring, The Convict found himself surrounded by everyone. Sean went for a super kick, but The Convict ducked, and it inadvertently hit Sentinel.
Billy Taylor and Wesley Wagner were shocked, and jumped Sean and Fergus. The Convict fled, and the three Samurais tried to break up the scrap between the O’Tooles and Team Sentinel. But as the fights were being pulled apart, Wesley Wagner stumbled, and landed right onto Onaga’s injured knee, causing him to scream in pain.
It was now the Samurai's upset, who went after Team Sentinel, delivering clotheslines to get them outside the ring, only for Ozzie and Trickshot to turn around and each meet a Super Kick from Sean and Fergus.
Only the O’Toole Brothers stood, and they raised their arms in victory.
Edward Findleton: Well I don’t know what the hell that devolved into. We had the most spirited, friendly competition match ever that turned into absolute chaos really quickly!
THE Casey Gains: Were there truly any winners in that? Because as the Biofuel Engineers said…The Firing Squad are in Destroy All Wrestlers, they aren’t defending their titles at End of the Trail.
Edward Findleton: Well the clear winner is you, the viewer!
THE Casey Gains: Are you kidding me with-
Edward Findleton: Because we have some intense backstage footage right now! Let’s go to it!
In the hallways, Mayor Briggs and Franco Mancini were having a war of words, with Bigg Pimpin’ Alex and The United States holding Briggs back. At the same time, they were all walking forward, presumably towards the entrance way as they passed off The Biofuel Engineers.
Franco Mancini: It’s your fault you punk! You just HAD to keep getting involved in my business!
Mayor Briggs: The hell ya talkin’ about?! Ya been away all year while I’m workin’ my ass off!
At this point, they had spilled out onto the ramp, slowly making their way to the ring, Franco Mancini yelling how Briggs never accomplished anything, and Mayor Briggs screaming that Franco is entitled and lazy. In the ring Briggs finally broke free of his City Council members and got right into Mancini’s face, the two not trading blows but still trading insults, spit flying everywhere. This continued until Harvey Allison’s music interrupted the two. The National Champion then emerged and walked down to the ring.
Harvey Allison: Excuse me? What are you two going on about? This is ridiculous! You two are angry?! I’M the one who got screwed here! Now I have to defend in a triple threat match!? How is this fair to me!? This is disrespect to the HAW National Champion!
Briggs and Mancini stopped, looked at each other, then at Allison.
Mayor Briggs: Mate, seriously?
Franco Mancini: You attacked us last week!
Mancini and Briggs then grabbed Allison and started beating him down. Briggs eventually hit a Half and Half Suplex on Allison, while Mancini hit a Pickpocket, leaving the Handsome Harvey Allison down and out in the ring.
Briggs and Mancini seemed to have a brief understanding, until the insults started flowing again. Alex and The United States physically lifted Briggs up, taking him out of the ring and up the ramp, as Franco followed, shouting back at Briggs.
Edward Findleton: Well folks, uhh….that’s our show! We’ll see you next week where we find out the final competitor in Destroy All Wrestlers. Good night!
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