The show opened up with Douglas Brunswick walking outside the arena, where he found Crash MuscleGate, Frederic St. Pierre, and Lovable Liam.
Douglas Brunswick: Nice night in Raleigh, right?
Crash MuscleGate: …Is that some sort of code?
Douglas Brunswick: Not at all, I’m just remarking how perfect the weather is.
Crash MuscleGate: And that’s why you wanted to meet us out here? Look, I said last week was an exhibition match, and I know you tried to get into my head by choosing Frederic, and I know I’m now in your head because you’ve never pinned me and you’re never going to and you’re afraid you’re going to lose the title, and I honestly forget where I was going with this thought.
Douglas Brunswick: You’re right, you beat me. It sucked. I’m the World Champion…and you pinned me. Maybe it was a lucky shot, maybe it was superior skill, whatever, we’ll find out next week. But tonight…I want to beat YOU. And hold up, I don’t mean attack you. I want…to race you.
Crash MuscleGate: ….Race me? Sprint or marathon? Two different things. I mean, I can beat you either way, I’ve got the best cardio in the company!
Douglas Brunswick: How about we do…a ten lap race around the arena? You talk about how great shape your’re in…but you’re getting older, and fresh off an injury. So let’s do your cardio…against mine.
Crash MuscleGate: Ok. Let’s do this. When do we start?
Douglas Brunswick: Let’s do it now. This is our finish line. Liam and Fred can judge.
Crash nodded to the two of them, and both got set.
Lovable Liam: Ok, on the count of three!
Frederic St. Pierre: Un….Deux…..Trois!
With that, Crash and Douglas took off running.
Edward Findleton: Welcome to HAW Throwdown, coming to you from Raleigh, North Carolina! We’ve got a fun show tonight, as our first match will be Cole Arcane and Pastor James teaming up to take on mystery opponents, and our main event will be Jonah Webb battling Sensei Onaga!
Cole Arcane’s music started up, and he got to the ramp before Pastor James’ music cut in, who had Dixie Boyle and Ivy Clarke with him. The two men shared an uneasy handshake, and walked down to the ring together, awaiting their opponents.
The lights dimmed, and the Visitors music started up, but instead of Glenny Pax and Cyberhemoth, it was two of the typical Visitor minions.
THE Casey Gains: This is the match? Those Visitor guys need numbers to do any damage!
Edward Findleton: This is the match Casey. But I agree, this isn't what I expected.
The match was underway, but the match was less a wrestling match, and more of a stunt show. Arcane and James got in control quickly, and it turned into James and Arcane trading forceful tags, as they tried to do complex or impressive slams and moves to the ragdoll Visitors. Finally Arcane hit his Running Bulldog, and James his Cobra Clutch Slam, and they both covered a Visitor, getting the three count.
Edward Findleton: Well we saw in ideal conditions what these guys can do, but Glenny Pax and Cyberhemoth are far from ideal.
THE Casey Gains: James and Cole both said anything you can do, I can do better. But they need to get back to working as a team and less as an “I” if they want to defeat the true Visitors for the tag titles next week.
As Arcane, James, Dixie, and Ivy left the ring, Harvey Allison’s music started up. The National Champion walked down with Strawberry Bates Hill, with Allison pointing to his title as he passed Cole and James, before getting into the ring with a microphone.
Harvey Allison: Remember last year when Cole Arcane debuted, and pulled off the huge upset to defeat me? And everyone felt sorta good about this no name loser getting his Cinderella moment? Well, the universe corrects itself, because look at things now! I’m a National Champion! He’s a nobody, just like Scarred Badger! I mean, atleast Cole Arcane looks…ok. I can see some weird women going for that degenerative bad boy look. But Scarred Badger? I mean…I don’t want to go on again about how ugly he is, especially compared to Handsome Harvey Allison…but I just can’t help but bring it up!
At that point, Scarred Badger had slid from under the ring behind Allison and Hill, and entered. In one hand, he had his go to weapon, a sock full of quarters, but also had a burlap bag that he placed down.
Harvey Allison: Also, as someone who has been in the ring with him, not only is he ugly…he smells! That body odor can be picked up a mile away! It’s like a massive alert that he’s here! That horrible stench of cigarettes mixed with sweat and a dash of moldy food still clinging to his stained shirt that hasn’t seen a washing machine in five years. Everything about this guy is horrible!
As Allison finally turned around, he got clocked in the head by the sock full of quarters. Badger swung at Hill, who jumped out of the ring and retreated up the ramp. Hill could only watch as Scarred Badger started to beat down Harvey Allison in the ring. Badger finally tossed the sock to the side, then grabbed the burlap bag. Badger poured the bag out, littering the ring with thumbtacks.
Edward Findleton: Oh no…
THE Casey Gains: Hill better get in there now or Handsome Harvey Allison won’t be so handsome soon!
Outside the ring, Hill paced back and forth, yelling at Badger to stop. Scarred Badger didn’t care, and picked up Harvey Allison. Badger got into position, lifted Harvey Allison up in the air, and suplexed him right onto the thumb tacks. Allison immediately started convulsing and screaming in pain, as a satisfied Badger left the ring, with Hill running in to help his ally.
Edward Findleton: Good God…Harvey Allison’s pain level has to be off the charts!
THE Casey Gains: Physically he should be good for next week but mentally…that’s tough to get over. That’s a brutal attack from Scarred Badger!
Edward Findleton: Well while Harvey Allison gets help, we’re getting word that the race is coming up on its final lap!
Outside the arena, Crash was in the lead, but could be seen laboring and getting tired. Crash turned the corner, and was on the home stretch towards the finish line with Liam and Frederic. As he continued to run, behind him, Douglas Brunswick could be seen, gaining ground. Crash turned to see Brunswick closing in, and tried to go faster, but started tiring himself out more. Brunswick put on the afterburners and started sprinting. Seconds later, Brunswick passed Crash, just maybe twenty feet from the finish line, and won the race. Both men were out of breath and panting.
Douglas Brunswick: Good race…maybe…maybe last week you got lucky…and this week I got lucky? Heh…oh well, atleast we can settle it in the ring next week.
Douglas patted Crash on the back, who was left out of breath and worried. As the MuscleGang departed, the silhouette of a figure far off in the distance was seen, unmoving, until the camera faded back to the arena.
Edward Findleton: Casey, that may be the first time I’ve ever seen Crash out of breath. We saw Brunswick go in an epic match against Franco Mancini last year, can he beat Brunswick if he’s not in perfect shape?
THE Casey Gains: He can. Brunswick has underestimated Crash before, and if he’s thinking he’s in better shape than him, he just might do it again. But it really seems like the challenger has an uphill battle.
Edward Findleton: With that said, it’s time for our main event!
The Samurais of Power entered, as Sensei Onaga was accompanied by Ozzie Reagan and Trickshot. Jonah Webb and The Shadow Hand followed, with Peter “Carnage” Horn, Jet Black, and Demon Lord Lenin May.
As the match started, Webb tried to wrestle with cheating and sneak attacks, but Onaga seemed to be ready for everything. Onaga was able to get Webb on the run, and hit the Headscissors DDT, pinning Webb in 9:22.
As soon as the bell rang, The Shadow Hand members wasted less than a second until they slid into the ring and tried to attack Onaga. Ozzie and Trickshot joined the ruckus, but the four on three numbers started to overwhelm the Samurais, until Kyle Higgins ran down the ramp. Higgins was able to start to turn the tide of battle, and The Shadow Hand eventually fled up to the top of the stage to regroup. Higgins took a microphone.
Kyle Higgins: You little punks want to do that to these guys? Well the Daddy says not on his watch! So if you’ve got any guts, then next week, The Shadow Hand will meet the Samurais of Power and Kyle Higgins in the ring!
A hurt Webb seemed to contemplate, then nodded, accepting the match. With that, Webb led Horn, Black, and May to the back, while the Samurais and Kyle stayed for the crowd and posed.
Edward Findleton: Well we’re about out of time for Throwdown, but our next HAW show is next Friday, HAW One Way Trip! For THE Casey Gains, I’m Edward Findleton. Good night!
~~~~~~~~
No comments:
Post a Comment